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 Maia Jäckel [DONE]

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PostSubject: Maia Jäckel [DONE]   Wed Jul 24, 2013 7:39 pm

Rodrik will be in limbo until I can find him something to do

Have you see the OVA or read the manga series of Hellsing?  If so how far have you gotten?  If not please direct your attention to YouTube, and watch OVA 1-4 at least.  Warning: If you have watched the anime we require you watch the OVA, or read the manga.  The anime is not canon.  This is not our opinion.  This is the law set down by the creator of Hellsing, Kouta Hirano.
Yush

Name: Maia Jäckel

Age: 74 (appears 15)

Gender: Female

Physical appearance: The first thing that’s noticed about Maia is her thin frame, she never put weight on after Auschwitz due to her vampirism stopping her body from changing much; this has left her ribs visible whenever she exhales. Her arms are lightly muscled but otherwise the skin is as pale and taut as it is over her ribs, the only difference being the number tattooed on her left forearm: B7780. Her eyes are rather wide giving her an innocent appearance, their colour is a rather pale blue that’s almost grey, the dark brown eyebrows are rather thin thus making them hard to see in some lights. Her hair reaches the middle of her shoulder blades; the dark brown locks though are kept in a braid so as to avoid it getting in the way. She grows it to signify the battles she has won; and if she loses she will cut it off and start again as a sign of shame. Her bust size is extremely small at a B cup and in some clothes they are practically invisible, though this annoys her Maia has learnt to put up with it not seeing it as a thing to get annoyed over. Her nails are slightly longer than most peoples, not long enough to be considered impractical but at the same time it’s a concession to have some femininity. Maia is quite short, at around 5 foot five she’s not a very large target and is mistakenly seen as quite weak due to her small size and frame.

Clothing of choice: The Jewish Vampires normal attire consists of grey DPM trousers with black standard assault boots, she also wears a grey tee-shirt with a navy blue coat with black buttons. The coat reaches her heels and has extremely deep pockets; this allows her to store her gas mask but at the same time when the coat is done up it buries her slightly. The sleeves have had to be modified to make sure her hands aren’t just swamped by it. By picking various shades of grey she tries to make herself seem inconspicuous, this normally works due to the blandness of the colour and the fact the eyes attracted to brighter colours as opposed to dull and lifeless ones. Maia also carries her gas mask with her everywhere she goes; lastly she has her webbing underneath the coat for storage of all of her bits and bobs. The spacious pouches includes two at the very front for ammunition, she has another two filled with other miscellaneous items.

Weaponry of choice: 5 Tear gas grenades in one of her pouches, they’re decently sized and there’s enough inside to fill what would be considered a big bedroom or living room.

A Saiga 12 shotgun with two 12 round box magazines, this is kept on a sling on her back.

M16: Maia uses a modified M16 rifle that uses modified .50 Beowulf rounds to give them more stopping power. She keeps two spare magazines in her ammo pouches for it with each magazine holding 30 rounds

Two blesses butterfly knives are kept in her coat pocket, this makes them easily accessible and ready for use.
*All her bullets are blessed silver with silver nitrate inside; this is so that when they enter the body the silver is released to cause more damage.

Race: Vampire Cat F

Abilities: Regeneration may take an extremely long amount of time for major damage (ie: 15 posts), meager supernatural strength, agility, stamina, durability, and reflexes, great weakness to silver and blessed weaponry to a point its fatal to be hit by one, easily killable just as a human is, ability to turn virgins into weak vampires like themselves, non-virgins into very weak ghouls, susceptible to unblessed damage (still fatal to them), the need to drink blood often, weakness to sunlight (as in they burn).

Third Eye: With her vampire’s third eye she can see through illusion and at a great distance to make otherwise impossible shots with guns, though it requires concentration to use and can leave her drained if she keeps using it without “switching it off” between uses.

Blood rage: When put under pressure and in a tight spot then it can cause Maia to snap, her craving for blood reaches a maximum and she loses it and goes berserk. Pain becomes meaningless and for two posts she becomes immune to pain and ignores injury, she pushes herself to breaking point and doesn’t stop until the rage has passed. This leaves her drained and feeling sick inside, though the tiredness can be avoided by drinking blood straight after.

Maia can sew to a good grade; she can also speak German Polish, English and Ukrainian. She has some good hand to hand skills being proficient in Judo, and also knowing street fighting and how to cheat in a fight. Aside from her main weapons she can’t use weapons very well, her time spent on her rifle and knives. As well as the tear gas, she can use this to maximum effectiveness so it covers the widest area; though that has more to don with knowing wind direction etc.

Organization: Hellsing

Personality: Maia is defined as being nervous, she has never got rid of the dark memories of Mengele and the Nazi regime. The pain is still vivid in her mind and it leaves her ready to snap quite easily, inside the Jewish woman is still bitter about everything what happened and can’t help but hate Nazis and Neo-Nazis. Though because of her timid nature she likes to be around people as it takes her mind off her thoughts, but loudmouths tend to make her cringe as well as drive her away quite easily. Loud and sudden noises can make her jump and she can get scared if the battle was unprepared for.

Images of horrific events and lots of blood tend to freeze her with shock; even though she is physically strong it doesn’t stop the PTSD from kicking in whenever she sees a Nazi uniform or a piece of insignia; she had almost forgotten and healed from the pain but Millennium opened the old wounds. She relives everything and it leaves her almost stunned with terror as she takes it all in, but after this initial shock passes her survival instinct kicks in as well as a dose of anger. Though she cares about what happened to her people she doesn’t like the religion, after the holocaust she can’t see herself as one of God’s chosen people. So she merely ignores the fact it’s a religion as well, it causes less problems for her.

Though despite the reopened wounds something changed, rather than cowering, anger took over along with sadism she never knew she had. Maia felt the urge to make the Nazis live in fear and persecute them, the Jew realised that she wanted revenge and she had a chance to get it. Despite the fear and the shock of seeing Millennium passes Maia gets angry. She wants to repay them for her hurt and as long as they live and breathe then she will have no problem purging them. In the silence of her mind and in every nightmare waking and sleeping Maia made an oath to burn them all up, the hunted and hated would rise up and make them suffer as she suffered. Although the sight of them sends her weak kneed, and in some cases shaking she is still able to compose herself due to her new found rage and conviction in destroying them at all costs for the “greater good,” in short she puts aside her hurt for a while as she turns the dormant fear into anger.

Outside of battle and when not having a panic attack or having flashbacks the Jewish lady is quiet, she enjoys planting things and has a small window tray of bonsai trees in her room. By surrounding herself with hobbies and keeping active it helps keep her sane, every moment Maia spends not doing a thing is one more she relives every scream. One of the main things she thinks of though is her Vampirism, she considers every time if it was right and if damnation is a worthy price for revenge, but so far she has always convinced herself that the hatred of the last of the third Reich deserves to be purged no matter the personal cost.

Rank: Field Operative

Biography: Maia was born in 1929 as a twin, her and her brother Max were the only children of a Jewish couple. Their father was a high ranking banker in the Reichsbank, they were popular in the Jewish community and overall were well liked. Though when Maia was 4 Hitler became Fuhrer through the enabling act, this gave him the power to make laws without the Reichstag(German Parliament.) Slowly the freedoms of the Jewish were restricted, violence became common against them and they lost rights as citizens while her father lost his job as did her mother. Things were going badly and it looked like it would only get worse, they decided to get out while they had the chance.

With stashed cash the family decided to leave to go to Poland and then to Britain, it was in 1935 when Maia was six that they left Germany. Going to stop with friends that left the country when Hitler first came to power her father remained paranoid; and while saving up more money tried to get them passage to somewhere safe. They finally left in 1939 while Poland was being taken over; the family were going to go to England on board the MS St Louis. Though they were turned away from everywhere they tried to get into; the refugees were refused access out of fear of Nazi reprisal.

Things were going badly and eventually they were simply kicked off and left in the Ukraine; When Hitler on June 22, 1941 launched his Drang nach Osten (Drive to the East) the Jewish family were finally caught up to by Hitler’s regime. The Ukraine and the east was invaded leaving them all vulnerable and in danger, they tried hiding but late into 1943 they were found by the Gestapo. Taken away the only thing to do was to get them sent to their doom, the children at the age of 14 were sent to Auschwitz. Loaded for a few days into tight cargo holds with a load of strangers; they were left wallowing in their own filth for what seemed like an age.

Then when they arrived at Birkenau they were taken out of the transport, and put in a long continuous line to be sorted into who would live and who would die. The man that would decide that was Josef Mengele, the angel of death and a doctor for the Nazis. The children, women and those deemed unfit for work were sent to die. The 14 year olds would have been as well if not for the fact the doctor kept “pets,” he enjoyed experimenting on twins and found them fascinating. Maia and Max were saved by being born together, they were then taken to what some would consider a worse fate.

In his medical block they were kept, free from hard work they were given better food yet at the same time were under the threat of perverse evil experiments under the angel. He at first began simply, introducing himself as “Uncle Josef” he tried to earn their trust. Smiling and with sweets he assessed them and after a few weeks his experiments began, Maia and Max were spared but watched in horror as he went in pursuit of knowledge. He tested things like the highest temperature a human can live to as well as the coldest, with speakers and a soundproof room they had to watch as a man’s eardrums burst with the wave of pure sound. At points he merely cut people up to look at their insides, yet week by week he ran out of interesting subjects until it was the twins turn.

The girl had been sleeping badly and the sights were destroying her mental stability, yet as she watched her brother was strapped to a chair and beaten. It was to see if twins felt each other’s pain yet the only thing the girl felt was fear and devastation, yet no matter how much she screamed it never stopped, as things carried on she ended up just cowering in the corner as the blood began to flow. Merely punching and kicking had grown boring, Mengele had started dissecting Max without anaesthetic. Yet soon the blood flow stopped, her last surviving family member was dead. The blood was everywhere, and with a cry of Despair Maia was aware that the blood had flown to her across the room to her. Voices whispered to her with promises of revenge and help, the strength to save herself from what was going to happen next. All she had to do was drink and the pain would leave.

She gave a yelp and renounced god and everything else, it was all a load of crap to her and it brought only pain. From then on she would only believe in hatred and her own strength, the blood slaked her thirst and filled her with unholy vigour. It was then that Mengele’s attention turned to the no longer weeping child, with a scalpel he pinned her to the table next to the one her brother’s body was on. He was going to cut her up to compare the size of the siblings organs, with a mad laugh the dissection began. Ripping her striped pyjamas he cut into her stomach, pulling back the skin he was about to finish her off and get the experiment over with before he got a message. The commandant’s health had failed and he was now having a heart attack, they needed Mengele to see if anything could be done.

The SS officer was saved yet it took some hours, a frustrated Mengele slept then went to see the cold dead bodies. Yet was shocked to see the girl he had dissected merely sleeping, with a cry he went and tied her down before making more random incisions. They were small, merely to see if he was still sane. Yet as he saw the wounds close up he was at a loss to understand why, yet getting some officials from the ministry for science down he showed them the latest in his sick menagerie. They were intrigued yet only one man could give some explanation, he merely called himself Dok. With a seal of approval from Hitler himself; the Millennium project took over this new discovery for their own ends. Experiments were done with knives and the odd bullet, yet Maia survived in the bunker in which she was poked and prodded. Finally in 1944 she was taken to Warsaw in Poland for more experiments in the main facility, it was then that she finally became free.

The Hellsing organisation attacked the complex and in the chaos of everything Maia was able to kill the soldier guarding her, and steal his gun. Running amok through the complex she managed to get to safety, covered in the blood of her enemies and her own she collapsed in the night under a small lee out in the middle of nowhere. She had taken wounds and would have to wait before carrying on, she threw the gun aside and waited to heal.

The next evening came and a rejuvenated girl rose and proceeded to run, it was a dangerous time for her and by avoiding towns she could stay alive. The Dok had explained to her what she was, a monster. She told her how blood worked and what would happen if she went without, it was realising this that Maia made the decision to only drink the blood of animals she came across so as to avoid detection. The haunting images in her mind filled her with dread, but now she was a monster and for now she was the strong one.

She managed to get to get to Malbork over the course of a month, a place relatively untouched by the war. Living in alleys and surviving on stray cats the hunger was only kept at bay, she came to the decision that to survive she needed a more substantial meal. That meant a human, so while trying to pick out a target the young Vampire realised something: It would have to be someone she could easily feed from without getting caught, she had escaped detection and it couldn’t last forever. She would move on to another town after she fed, so eventually she decided it would be a late night German soldier out for a drink. So while a young man was on his way home from the local beer hall he heard a scream, with all caution thrown away he went to the alley to see what it was. Seeing what seemed like a young girl on the floor clutching her leg, the man tried to help. But as he went into the mouth of the alley and knelt in front of her, she jumped on him. Teeth closed in on his jugular and he was fed upon, the blood flowed from him. When he was a husk he was hidden in rubble and the girl fled, she only had little time before people would start looking for him; and she couldn’t be sure if no-one had noticed her.

She fled as far as she could along the coast, eventually though she was found. Eventually though in 1945 after some months of hiding the Nazis surrendered, a famished Jewish girl came out and rejoiced in the streets as the allies paraded. She wasn’t sure where she was and she didn’t care, all that mattered was that it was over. After the turmoil had ceased she named herself as a Jew and was taken by the Russians back to the east, it was in Czechoslovakia that planes awaited her and a few other orphans to be taken to England.

When they arrived in England things were chaotic, but the people were happy and things were generally quiet. Maia tried putting things behind her and settles down in the Peak district where she was relocated to, but when the town she lived in was subject to a Vampire attack in which the town was held hostage. The place was sealed off and soldiers from Hellsing tried to contain it, yet the soldiers were killed easily. In the end the Jew was left with no other choice but to take up arms once more, the thing would try and kill everyone soon and she couldn’t allow it to attack and kill her. She had gone through too much to try and let a weakling kill her, confronting the Vampire the two fought, and though Maia was still bested and stabbed in the shoulder. But the opening was enough for the Hellsing men to get past the ghouls and kill it with machine gun fire; going to the downed woman they expected her to have died from blood loss. But were surprised to see her merely regenerating at a slow rate, it was at this point she was dragged under heavy guard to Hellsing.

Given the chance to serve by Arthur Hellsing Maia chose to follow the man, living in servitude was infinitely better than no life at all. She would still have freedom, the only difference being she would hunt down Vampires who had gone feral. She would have a purpose again, that’s all that mattered at that point. “get busy living, or get busy dying”

Many questioned why Arthur let her in but the answer was relatively simple, with Alucard locked away the organisation was weakened. He couldn’t afford to have such a powerful weapon but in the case of Maia she was weak willed, as long as she stayed that way and didn’t show signs of going out of control she would be a commodity. Her quiet nature kept her in line; the meekness ensured her continuing loyalty despite her instability. This line of thinking earned Maia her place in Hellsing, her continued service has allowed her to keep it.

RP sample: Maia waited for an eternity for the targets, they were FREAKs sent to retrieve a package of some sorts but rather than the package, there was the Jewish woman waiting for them. With a smile the teenage looking girl hummed a little tune whilst waiting for them to enter the warehouse; she grimaced inside as the image flashed. The woman clutching her baby, it screamed as the two were separated. The SS men grinned as they dragged the woman away; finally as she clawed one of their backs sobbing as she did so they relented. Giving her the baby they got her to stand in the middle of the camp square, the guns raised and were cocked quietly

The creaking of the door awoke her from the memories; Maia felt her heart in her mouth. Her right eye twitched as the insignia flared before her, they were brazenly flaunting their filth before people. It made Maia sick, retching inside she forced herself to try and sound civil.

“Your package is inside that crate,”
“ve vere told you vould be loading it for us” the leader of the duo said
“Fine, help me then. I’m just a woman” the Jew said through gritted teeth

They followed her and as she reached the crate her mind wandered, what did they need it for. She hadn’t had time to look inside, the informant was only a husk a few minutes before they arrived. Yet it mattered not, she span around and the butterfly knives came out. Flicking one out at the stooge’s throat he collapsed without a sound, yet the leader dodged and punched her in the ribs. Flying back into the crate he pressed his advantage, leering at her he tried pinning her down. Images flashed in her mind of brutality, it was all getting too much and he was too strong, this was sickening.

“You vill enjoy zis don’t you vorry, you kill my frie-“

Her eyes turned red, he broke off. A fist flashed and he was knocked back, his nose was broken. Maia charged into him and punched him time and time again, he was pinned on the floor in a daze as the rage fled her. She felt dizzy but now wasn’t the time to give up, a pair of pliers she’d picked up earlier came out. “Tell me what you need that crate for, I’ll start with your fingernails if you don’t!” yet as she dragged him up he caught fire. Millennium never lasted long enough for the payback, they were boring.


Last edited by Lydia Russo on Thu Jul 25, 2013 4:02 pm; edited 5 times in total
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PostSubject: Re: Maia Jäckel [DONE]   Thu Jul 25, 2013 5:54 am

Could you add more details about the guns please.
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PostSubject: Re: Maia Jäckel [DONE]   Thu Jul 25, 2013 11:12 am

Couple things.

1) Not really following why she never gained any weight after the camp. Those poor people were essentially walking skeletons due to their treatment there. So many years of living freely after camp should have put some meat on her bones.

2) Reread the Clothing Section, couple sentence issues such as "the eyes attracted to brighter colours as opposed to bright ones."

3) Not really fond of the Blood Rage ability. Two posts rising into Cat D abilities might not mean much now, but assuming you continue to level up we could very easily see this turn into problems. The other Staff can weigh in on it and may be cool with it but I'm very sketchy on it. Also, according to this Ability Section your character has no idea how to use the guns or knives in your Weaponry Section.

4) Compare this line in the first paragraph of your personality "Images of horrific events and lots of blood tend to freeze her with shock; even though she is physically strong it doesn’t stop the PTSD from kicking in whenever she sees a Nazi uniform or a piece of insignia;" with this line in the second paragraph, "Despite the fear and the shock of blood when it comes to Millennium it’s easier to deal with". So can she handle it or not? You're kind of contradicting yourself as it stands.

5) Number four brings up my biggest issue with this girl. I don't get why she'd exist. Why would Hellsing take her in? Let alone the Hellsing Organization while it was being run by Arthur in his alcoholic bastard days. Not only is she a vampire (that wasn't turned and dragged back by Alucard) but she's also wildly unstable. With Seras and Ben, Integra was understandably upset with the unauthorized recruitment but there were extenuating circumstances and both of them were mentally stable and possessed at least some useful skills. This woman suffers from wild PTSD in the face of Nazis (Hellsing's main enemy).

Those are the five big things I spotted in the sheet. Once you've cleared them up I'll take another look at the sheet but it's gonna take some work to convince me Hellsing has any reason to let this vampire chicky into their ranks.
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PostSubject: Re: Maia Jäckel [DONE]   Thu Jul 25, 2013 5:05 pm

Lydia Russo wrote:
Name: Maia Jäckel

There's a name.

Names wrote:
Age: 74 (appears 15)

That might be a problem.

Young wrote:
Gender: Female

Lady person.

Girls wrote:
Physical appearance: The first thing that’s noticed about Maia is her thin frame, she never put weight on after Auschwitz due to her vampirism stopping her body from changing much; this has left her ribs visible whenever she exhales. Her arms are lightly muscled but otherwise the skin is as pale and taut as it is over her ribs, the only difference being the number tattooed on her left forearm: B7780.

Same problem with this as Anderson. Even as a vampire, this girl is going to fall over every time a strong wind hits her. Her ribs wouldn't just be visible when she breathes, either. (Warning for image: Graphic depiction of Jews at Auschwitz.) This is what kids in concentration camps looked like. You are not in fighting shape, vampire or otherwise. No muscle on those arms, either.

History wrote:
Her eyes are rather wide giving her an innocent appearance, their colour is a rather pale blue that’s almost grey, the dark brown eyebrows are rather thin thus making them hard to see in some lights. Her hair reaches the middle of her shoulder blades; the dark brown locks though are kept in a braid so as to avoid it getting in the way. She grows it to signify the battles she has won; and if she loses she will cut it off and start again as a sign of shame.

Vampires don't grow hair. She was at a concentration camp, so it was shaved off.

Do research wrote:
Her bust size is extremely small at a B cup and in some clothes they are practically invisible, though this annoys her Maia has learnt to put up with it not seeing it as a thing to get annoyed over. Her nails are slightly longer than most peoples, not long enough to be considered impractical but at the same time it’s a concession to have some femininity. Maia is quite short, at around 5 foot five she’s not a very large target and is mistakenly seen as quite weak due to her small size and frame.

1. B cup isn't "extremely" small. On the same note as everything else here, it's more likely she has next to nothing there, as breasts are fat and there would be virtually none of it on her body.

2. Her nails would be worn down from working, but I can probably let that one go since vampires are meant to have claws.

3. 5'5'' is too tall for someone in starvation.

Disappoint wrote:
Clothing of choice: The Jewish Vampires normal attire consists of grey DPM trousers with black standard assault boots, she also wears a grey tee-shirt with a navy blue coat with black buttons. The coat reaches her heels and has extremely deep pockets; this allows her to store her gas mask but at the same time when the coat is done up it buries her slightly. The sleeves have had to be modified to make sure her hands aren’t just swamped by it. By picking various shades of grey she tries to make herself seem inconspicuous, this normally works due to the blandness of the colour and the fact the eyes attracted to brighter colours as opposed to dull and lifeless ones. Maia also carries her gas mask with her everywhere she goes; lastly she has her webbing underneath the coat for storage of all of her bits and bobs. The spacious pouches includes two at the very front for ammunition, she has another two filled with other miscellaneous items.

What's with all the gas masks lately?

Masks wrote:
Weaponry of choice: 5 Tear gas grenades in one of her pouches, they’re decently sized and there’s enough inside to fill what would be considered a big bedroom or living room.

A Saiga 12 shotgun with two 12 round box magazines, this is kept on a sling on her back.

M16: Maia uses a modified M16 rifle that uses modified .50 Beowulf rounds to give them more stopping power. She keeps two spare magazines in her ammo pouches for it with each magazine holding 30 rounds

Two blesses butterfly knives are kept in her coat pocket, this makes them easily accessible and ready for use.
*All her bullets are blessed silver with silver nitrate inside; this is so that when they enter the body the silver is released to cause more damage.

Weapons.

The Gang Gets Extreme wrote:
Race: Vampire Cat F

Second one in Hellsing.

Vampire hunters wrote:
Abilities: Regeneration may take an extremely long amount of time for major damage (ie: 15 posts), meager supernatural strength, agility, stamina, durability, and reflexes, great weakness to silver and blessed weaponry to a point its fatal to be hit by one, easily killable just as a human is, ability to turn virgins into weak vampires like themselves, non-virgins into very weak ghouls, susceptible to unblessed damage (still fatal to them), the need to drink blood often, weakness to sunlight (as in they burn).

Third Eye: With her vampire’s third eye she can see through illusion and at a great distance to make otherwise impossible shots with guns, though it requires concentration to use and can leave her drained if she keeps using it without “switching it off” between uses.

Pretty much accepted that one's part of vampire stuff from the get-go.

Quote wrote:
Blood rage: When put under pressure and in a tight spot then it can cause Maia to snap, her craving for blood reaches a maximum and she loses it and goes berserk. Pain becomes meaningless and for two posts she becomes immune to pain and ignores injury, she pushes herself to breaking point and doesn’t stop until the rage has passed. This leaves her drained and feeling sick inside, though the tiredness can be avoided by drinking blood straight after.

This isn't an ability. All vampires can do this. They don't become invincible; they just want blood and will try to kill everything in sight.

Said wrote:
Maia can sew to a good grade; she can also speak German Polish, English and Ukrainian. She has some good hand to hand skills being proficient in Judo, and also knowing street fighting and how to cheat in a fight. Aside from her main weapons she can’t use weapons very well, her time spent on her rifle and knives. As well as the tear gas, she can use this to maximum effectiveness so it covers the widest area; though that has more to don with knowing wind direction etc.

Where does a concentration camp survivor learn Judo? I can't see this girl fighting anything.

Jewdo wrote:
Organization: Hellsing

No men in the group anymore.

Girl power wrote:
Personality: Maia is defined as being nervous, she has never got rid of the dark memories of Mengele and the Nazi regime. The pain is still vivid in her mind and it leaves her ready to snap quite easily, inside the Jewish woman is still bitter about everything what happened and can’t help but hate Nazis and Neo-Nazis. Though because of her timid nature she likes to be around people as it takes her mind off her thoughts, but loudmouths tend to make her cringe as well as drive her away quite easily. Loud and sudden noises can make her jump and she can get scared if the battle was unprepared for.

Images of horrific events and lots of blood tend to freeze her with shock; even though she is physically strong it doesn’t stop the PTSD from kicking in whenever she sees a Nazi uniform or a piece of insignia; she had almost forgotten and healed from the pain but Millennium opened the old wounds. She relives everything and it leaves her almost stunned with terror as she takes it all in, but after this initial shock passes her survival instinct kicks in as well as a dose of anger. Though she cares about what happened to her people she doesn’t like the religion, after the holocaust she can’t see herself as one of God’s chosen people. So she merely ignores the fact it’s a religion as well, it causes less problems for her.

Blow on this girl and she falls over. I must say again: SOMEONE WHO HAS NUMEROUS PTSD FLASHBACKS EVERY TIME THEY GO INTO A BATTLE IS NOT FIT TO BE A SOLDIER.

Kick wrote:
Though despite the reopened wounds something changed, rather than cowering, anger took over along with sadism she never knew she had. Maia felt the urge to make the Nazis live in fear and persecute them, the Jew realised that she wanted revenge and she had a chance to get it. Despite the fear and the shock of seeing Millennium passes Maia gets angry. She wants to repay them for her hurt and as long as they live and breathe then she will have no problem purging them. In the silence of her mind and in every nightmare waking and sleeping Maia made an oath to burn them all up, the hunted and hated would rise up and make them suffer as she suffered. Although the sight of them sends her weak kneed, and in some cases shaking she is still able to compose herself due to her new found rage and conviction in destroying them at all costs for the “greater good,” in short she puts aside her hurt for a while as she turns the dormant fear into anger.



PTSD does not make you Batman. No to everything I just read.

Google this stuff wrote:
Outside of battle and when not having a panic attack or having flashbacks the Jewish lady is quiet, she enjoys planting things and has a small window tray of bonsai trees in her room. By surrounding herself with hobbies and keeping active it helps keep her sane, every moment Maia spends not doing a thing is one more she relives every scream. One of the main things she thinks of though is her Vampirism, she considers every time if it was right and if damnation is a worthy price for revenge, but so far she has always convinced herself that the hatred of the last of the third Reich deserves to be purged no matter the personal cost.

Bonsai would die in a room without sun. Kind of thought it should be apparent plants need the sun to live. You continue to reinforce why this girl should not be a soldier; she is not in a healthy state, emotionally or physically.

Pain wrote:
Rank: Field Operative

That's not a good idea.

Enthusiastic walks in the woods x10 wrote:
Biography: Maia was born in 1929 as a twin, her and her brother Max were the only children of a Jewish couple. Their father was a high ranking banker in the Reichsbank, they were popular in the Jewish community and overall were well liked. Though when Maia was 4 Hitler became Fuhrer through the enabling act, this gave him the power to make laws without the Reichstag(German Parliament.) Slowly the freedoms of the Jewish were restricted, violence became common against them and they lost rights as citizens while her father lost his job as did her mother. Things were going badly and it looked like it would only get worse, they decided to get out while they had the chance.

I have no idea how you manage to know this much about German history, yet still misrepresent concentration camps and PTSD so badly.

Confused wrote:
With stashed cash the family decided to leave to go to Poland and then to Britain, it was in 1935 when Maia was six that they left Germany. Going to stop with friends that left the country when Hitler first came to power her father remained paranoid; and while saving up more money tried to get them passage to somewhere safe. They finally left in 1939 while Poland was being taken over; the family were going to go to England on board the MS St Louis. Though they were turned away from everywhere they tried to get into; the refugees were refused access out of fear of Nazi reprisal.

Where was he getting the extra money when he lost his job?

Still confused wrote:
Things were going badly and eventually they were simply kicked off and left in the Ukraine; When Hitler on June 22, 1941 launched his Drang nach Osten (Drive to the East) the Jewish family were finally caught up to by Hitler’s regime. The Ukraine and the east was invaded leaving them all vulnerable and in danger, they tried hiding but late into 1943 they were found by the Gestapo. Taken away the only thing to do was to get them sent to their doom, the children at the age of 14 were sent to Auschwitz. Loaded for a few days into tight cargo holds with a load of strangers; they were left wallowing in their own filth for what seemed like an age.

All things considered, they did pretty good for people who couldn't find lodging.

Confusion wrote:
Then when they arrived at Birkenau they were taken out of the transport, and put in a long continuous line to be sorted into who would live and who would die. The man that would decide that was Josef Mengele, the angel of death and a doctor for the Nazis. The children, women and those deemed unfit for work were sent to die. The 14 year olds would have been as well if not for the fact the doctor kept “pets,” he enjoyed experimenting on twins and found them fascinating. Maia and Max were saved by being born together, they were then taken to what some would consider a worse fate.

Bit convenient, but nothing unbelievable as far as Nazis go.

Nazis wrote:
In his medical block they were kept, free from hard work they were given better food yet at the same time were under the threat of perverse evil experiments under the angel. He at first began simply, introducing himself as “Uncle Josef” he tried to earn their trust. Smiling and with sweets he assessed them and after a few weeks his experiments began, Maia and Max were spared but watched in horror as he went in pursuit of knowledge. He tested things like the highest temperature a human can live to as well as the coldest, with speakers and a soundproof room they had to watch as a man’s eardrums burst with the wave of pure sound. At points he merely cut people up to look at their insides, yet week by week he ran out of interesting subjects until it was the twins turn.

There's no reason for them to be treated better if he just planned to mutilate them in the end.

Confused again wrote:
The girl had been sleeping badly and the sights were destroying her mental stability, yet as she watched her brother was strapped to a chair and beaten. It was to see if twins felt each other’s pain yet the only thing the girl felt was fear and devastation, yet no matter how much she screamed it never stopped, as things carried on she ended up just cowering in the corner as the blood began to flow. Merely punching and kicking had grown boring, Mengele had started dissecting Max without anaesthetic. Yet soon the blood flow stopped, her last surviving family member was dead. The blood was everywhere, and with a cry of Despair Maia was aware that the blood had flown to her across the room to her. Voices whispered to her with promises of revenge and help, the strength to save herself from what was going to happen next. All she had to do was drink and the pain would leave.

Nope. No. Nein. Nyet. That is not how it happens. People who are near death or about to die get offered. People with strong will get offered. Crying little girls do not get offered. She's only drinking the blood of one person, so she's the world's weakest vampire even if it did happen. Combine that with malnutrition, disease, and a multitude of injuries, and she'd be totally unable to do anything.

NO wrote:
She gave a yelp and renounced god and everything else, it was all a load of crap to her and it brought only pain. From then on she would only believe in hatred and her own strength, the blood slaked her thirst and filled her with unholy vigour. It was then that Mengele’s attention turned to the no longer weeping child, with a scalpel he pinned her to the table next to the one her brother’s body was on. He was going to cut her up to compare the size of the siblings organs, with a mad laugh the dissection began. Ripping her striped pyjamas he cut into her stomach, pulling back the skin he was about to finish her off and get the experiment over with before he got a message. The commandant’s health had failed and he was now having a heart attack, they needed Mengele to see if anything could be done.

The SS officer was saved yet it took some hours, a frustrated Mengele slept then went to see the cold dead bodies. Yet was shocked to see the girl he had dissected merely sleeping, with a cry he went and tied her down before making more random incisions. They were small, merely to see if he was still sane. Yet as he saw the wounds close up he was at a loss to understand why, yet getting some officials from the ministry for science down he showed them the latest in his sick menagerie. They were intrigued yet only one man could give some explanation, he merely called himself Dok. With a seal of approval from Hitler himself; the Millennium project took over this new discovery for their own ends. Experiments were done with knives and the odd bullet, yet Maia survived in the bunker in which she was poked and prodded. Finally in 1944 she was taken to Warsaw in Poland for more experiments in the main facility, it was then that she finally became free.

I don't know if I'm reading this wrong, but I sincerely hope I am. Are you trying to say your girl is responsible for Millennium having vampires? If so:



ljhkfhdfgjbhhghgbhjbh wrote:
The Hellsing organisation attacked the complex and in the chaos of everything Maia was able to kill the soldier guarding her, and steal his gun.

No she didn't. She's a malnourished twig who can barely walk.

No wrote:
Running amok through the complex she managed to get to safety,

No she didn't. She was gunned down because she can't fight.

[b]No[/b] wrote:
covered in the blood of her enemies and her own she collapsed in the night under a small lee out in the middle of nowhere. She had taken wounds and would have to wait before carrying on, she threw the gun aside and waited to heal.

No she didn't. She died from taking all those injuries, because she's an F level vampire who hasn't drank hardly any blood. Or Alucard or Walter found her and killed her.

[b]NO[/b] wrote:
The next evening came and a rejuvenated girl rose and proceeded to run, it was a dangerous time for her and by avoiding towns she could stay alive. The Dok had explained to her what she was, a monster. She told her how blood worked and what would happen if she went without, it was realising this that Maia made the decision to only drink the blood of animals she came across so as to avoid detection. The haunting images in her mind filled her with dread, but now she was a monster and for now she was the strong one.

Nooooo she didn't. She burned up because she's outside in the middle of the day. Dok wouldn't bother explaining vampirism to a test subject.

[u][b]NO[/b][/u] wrote:
She managed to get to get to Malbork over the course of a month, a place relatively untouched by the war. Living in alleys and surviving on stray cats the hunger was only kept at bay, she came to the decision that to survive she needed a more substantial meal. That meant a human, so while trying to pick out a target the young Vampire realised something:  It would have to be someone she could easily feed from without getting caught, she had escaped detection and it couldn’t last forever. She would move on to another town after she fed, so eventually she decided it would be a late night German soldier out for a drink. So while a young man was on his way home from the local beer hall he heard a scream, with all caution thrown away he went to the alley to see what it was. Seeing what seemed like a young girl on the floor clutching her leg, the man tried to help. But as he went into the mouth of the alley and knelt in front of her, she jumped on him. Teeth closed in on his jugular and he was fed upon, the blood flowed from him. When he was a husk he was hidden in rubble and the girl fled, she only had little time before people would start looking for him; and she couldn’t be sure if no-one had noticed her.

She fled as far as she could along the coast, eventually though she was found. Eventually though in 1945 after some months of hiding the Nazis surrendered, a famished Jewish girl came out and rejoiced in the streets as the allies paraded. She wasn’t sure where she was and she didn’t care, all that mattered was that it was over. After the turmoil had ceased she named herself as a Jew and was taken by the Russians back to the east, it was in Czechoslovakia that planes awaited her and a few other orphans to be taken to England.

When they arrived in England things were chaotic, but the people were happy and things were generally quiet. Maia tried putting things behind her and settles down in the Peak district where she was relocated to, but when the town she lived in was subject to a Vampire attack in which the town was held hostage. The place was sealed off and soldiers from Hellsing tried to contain it, yet the soldiers were killed easily. In the end the Jew was left with no other choice but to take up arms once more, the thing would try and kill everyone soon and she couldn’t allow it to attack and kill her. She had gone through too much to try and let a weakling kill her, confronting the Vampire the two fought, and though Maia was still bested and stabbed in the shoulder. But the opening was enough for the Hellsing men to get past the ghouls and kill it with machine gun fire; going to the downed woman they expected her to have died from blood loss. But were surprised to see her merely regenerating at a slow rate, it was at this point she was dragged under heavy guard to Hellsing.

Given the chance to serve by Arthur Hellsing Maia chose to follow the man, living in servitude was infinitely better than no life at all. She would still have freedom, the only difference being she would hunt down Vampires who had gone feral. She would have a purpose again, that’s all that mattered at that point. “get busy living, or get busy dying”

Nope. She's dead. Unarmed, malnourished, concentration camp vampire dies in the streets, since the sun exists. Hellsing doesn't care about her. Arthur wouldn't want her.

Make it stop wrote:
Many questioned why Arthur let her in but the answer was relatively simple, with Alucard locked away the organisation was weakened. He couldn’t afford to have such a powerful weapon but in the case of Maia she was weak willed, as long as she stayed that way and didn’t show signs of going out of control she would be a commodity. Her quiet nature kept her in line; the meekness ensured her continuing loyalty despite her instability. This line of thinking earned Maia her place in Hellsing, her continued service has allowed her to keep it.

How about we not have a vampire maid thing in Hellsing since before Integra was born.[/quote]

I think Anderson summed it up best when he asked: Why does this girl exist? She is not a soldier. She cannot fight. There is no reason for Hellsing to keep her. There is no way she could even be alive. There is an alarming lack of research in this sheet concerning very important and sensative topics, and it really disappoints me that you'd be able to make something like this.

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PostSubject: Re: Maia Jäckel [DONE]   Thu Jul 25, 2013 8:40 pm

Seeing the finished product, I'm afraid my doubts still haven't been lifted. I'm sorry bud.

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PostSubject: Re: Maia Jäckel [DONE]   Thu Jul 25, 2013 9:31 pm

Have to agree with the John and Anderson.  My biggest problem is the misrepresentation.  That was practically genocide.  There is a lack of a proper explanation in the Bio to support the claim that she is a Hellsing Agent.  

In all honesty the concept it self was just bad.  In order for this sheet to be passable you would essentially rewrite the entire sheet.  


sorry but I have to disapprove


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