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 Gintama Azazell

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PostSubject: Gintama Azazell   Fri Oct 26, 2012 12:07 pm

Yoink


Last edited by Gintama Azazell on Sat Nov 03, 2012 12:22 am; edited 10 times in total
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PostSubject: Re: Gintama Azazell   Fri Oct 26, 2012 5:07 pm

Okey dokey, let's go through this step by step.

Name: Very odd but I have no problems with it.

Age: Late twenties to early forties is a rather large gap when describing his appearance. Beyond just that, we need an actual age for this guy, not just how old he looks.

Gender: No complaints of course.

Physical Appearance: Try and add in a bit more detail (Facial features, ethnicity, eye color, etc.) Also, what's this business about his hair ranging in color and length?

Weapons: A talking sword? Gonna need some explanation for how that works. Along with that, more detail on the weapons please. How large are these daggers, what are they made of, how many of them does he have, etc.

Race: The race I think you're looking for is "Special Human" as outlined in our race list.

Abilities: Negative energy resembling red electricity? Lose the energy blasts and make it plain electricity and we'll talk. On that note, we're going to need an idea of what kind of voltage this guy can produce. Next up, how much punishment can this guy take? Does he have the standard vampire weaknesses to decapitation or a heart shot? What does torturing another living being have to do with him healing? Lastly, if you want to be a shapeshifter that's fine or if you'd like electrical powers that's fine. However, you're gonna need to pick one and stick with it.

Organization: Unaffiliated it is. No complaints from me though that bit about assassination training fits better in the abilities section.

Personality: We're gonna need much more detail here. At the very least a single large paragraph.

Rank: Fine by me.

Biography: This doesn't tell us much. Where was he born? How'd he get his powers? How'd he get here? Just because the character doesn't remember his past doesn't mean that you as an author don't. Tell us his story from the beginning.

RP Sample: Not a bad start but there's no sample of him interacting with other people and more importantly no sample of him in a combat situation. Add those in and it's all good here.

Overall this sheet had decent potential. All you need to do is focus it a bit and add in some meaty detail around the template you've already created. If you have any additional questions feel free to send me a PM or just hit me or other staff members up in the chatbox.
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PostSubject: Re: Gintama Azazell   Fri Oct 26, 2012 8:52 pm

Redone I supose I've well and done everything to dull down his powers entirely
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Integra F. W. Hellsing
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PostSubject: Re: Gintama Azazell   Fri Oct 26, 2012 10:33 pm

We're not trying to dull down just make it more according to the world of Hellsing, and what was presented to us from the manga. He was nice enough to let you pick if you want electricity or shape shifting, and I'm getting the impression your comment was a "there you happy now?"

You're obviously very passionate about RPing, and your characters so please put that passion into your effort every time. We don't ask you to remove something to make your character boring we simply want to have the power balances in check. Afterall Alucard, Hans, and Father Anderson are the ace's of the series so to speak. They are each the most powerful person each faction has. So from there we figure out where everyone else would stand.

On that note Anderson did ask you to specify things about the electricity your character would produce. He's only asking this to motivate you and to find out about your character. We do this from time to time when we are truly curious about an OC, and we are eager to know more. What we want out of sheets ultimately is detail. In other words we like to have quality not quantity. Sometimes it's wonderful to have both. Since you are a experienced RPer then you will understand we do appreciate quality.

So please don't think we want to strip your character of everything because we don't. Creativity is what makes RPing fun. However, forum's do have rules, and those rules do need to be followed because if we allowed one person to get away with the kitchen sink like how this forum started out before we were able to fix the flaws then it wouldn't be very much fun. Everyone would be more worried about powering up their characters and godmodding vs actual RPing.
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PostSubject: Re: Gintama Azazell   Fri Oct 26, 2012 10:41 pm

It wasnt a There you happy now thing, expressing emotion over forum is abit hard... I was worried the first time putting to much of who he was would just deem him instant disaproval. anyways I always mess up my first application to scale to reaction of others and what more specific terms and ideals they can give me.

Im not bothered at all really, its not really electricty, it moves like electricty but its more of a show of energy or aggitation. It feels like a shock to but its not, Gintamas pretty weak by himself, I hope I made some of it clear that there are some possibilities for me to be able to rp his sword and himself seperately pretty much if anyone found his sword Azazells able to interact with them.

Gintama can die like a normal human, he can take alot of damage but decapitation before he can turn to slime or something and hes screwed, he turns into his duel blades like azazell would his swords and is out of commission.

Im sorry if i came across harsh or upset, doing quite a few things at once lol
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PostSubject: Re: Gintama Azazell   Fri Oct 26, 2012 10:49 pm

It's quite alright.
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PostSubject: Re: Gintama Azazell   Fri Oct 26, 2012 10:51 pm

Now the long part of WAITING! lol
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PostSubject: Re: Gintama Azazell   Fri Oct 26, 2012 10:57 pm

you don't have more to add to the abilities?
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PostSubject: Re: Gintama Azazell   Fri Oct 26, 2012 11:05 pm

Well Maybe yeah quite a few things but he cant do much of anything other than take on a thick inky blob
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PostSubject: Re: Gintama Azazell   Sat Oct 27, 2012 12:12 am

Okay I think im done
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PostSubject: Re: Gintama Azazell   Fri Nov 02, 2012 5:59 am

bump maybe someone can give their input on weapons maybe?
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PostSubject: Re: Gintama Azazell   Fri Nov 02, 2012 9:07 am

Alright, I had hoped it wouldn't come to this but I'm just going to disapprove this. The demonic origins and powers, the spiritual sword housing an alternate dimension, and the vague portrayal of dual personalities are just too much for me. I'm sorry dude but it's a disapproval from me.

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PostSubject: Re: Gintama Azazell   Fri Nov 02, 2012 7:43 pm

Approvals: 0

Disapprovals: 2
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